Wednesday, November 2, 2011

The Great Halloween Staff-Room Raid! - A Short Story by Trev Teasdel

Prologue - Sarah Williams provided the following thought on Facebook for Halloween -

Here's a thought for halloween. We were all brought up and taught by people who had survived the war. They had fought, possibly even killed, done without luxuries, been frightened, suffered losses, not known what the future would be like. City of Cov School was set up because of the war. Its no wonder the place seems to hold so many ghosts."

Somehow a story appeared as if by magic! Any resemblances to real people, living or spectral, is purely debatable. (See comments below the story!)!

The Great Halloween Staff-Room Raid! - A Short Story by Trev Teasdel

T'was a cold frosty halloween night and all hallows had been let loose and a strange puffing noise approached the school playground from across the field. Jack O lantern alighted from the translucent guard van and with a swig of Jack Daniels opened the carriage doors.

"Oh fuck" said Partridge to Norman, half cut on a bottle of St Emillion that the midnight staff room had given them! "I'm seeing ghost trains - what do they put in this swig!" Nonetheless they continued to walk with their javelins at the ready, as they pushed through all the spooks and war victims that were crowding the playground.

"Just keep on walking back the to the dorm" said Norman, "the effects will soon wear off and you'll have a great nights sleep"  Partridge wasn't so sure, he'd just seen Tank approach with his head under his arm. "This is a nightmare" said Partridge "French wine's like that" said Norman reassuringly "it spooks the hell out of you and then comes bliss"

Partridge wasn't so sure as the playground resembled a French battlefield. "Welcome to Normandy beach" said Norman, pointing a rifle in his gut "shall we partake of fish and more wine" he said, as ghostly gun fire raged all around them. " there's a lovely little stream down the lane where we can get some peace and spear some good fish to cook"

Partridge was shaking "Never again shall I raid the staff room on halloween" "But it's just trick or treat my good friend - you'll be a better man for it!" said Norman, beginning to doubt himself!

Just then a flaming Spitfire pulled up outside the Bursar's office. "Get in" said Parker "Jerry's having a field day - on our field!"

The pair held on for dear life as Parker ran somersaults in the air, avoiding the crossfire. "Can you play the bagpipes" said Parker, "it will attract the Royal Scots Dragoons to our aid?" Partridge grappled with the bagpipes as he would a struggling octopus and managed to get a Monty Python tune out of the thing.

"Songs about Lumberjacks are not going to do the business" shouted Parker "the Dragoons want 'Donald where's your Trousers' - it's a code song" "We'll soon have you out of this and we can land safely in my office"

"Land in Parker's office!" Partridge had a bad feeling about this. The effects of the St Emillion were wearing off and Norman and Partridge were staring at Parker's strap. "So - two strapping lads, raiding the staff room on Halloween, drunk as a judge at the Queen's wedding" roared Parker!

Dawn was now breaking as the chaos abated and they heard the vague whistle of the ghost train heading back to Ditton Priors.

The two lads eyed Parker's strap as they drank black coffee out of Royal dragoon mugs.

"Open your hands" ordered Parker. Parker filled their hands with Liquorice All-Sorts. "And let that be a lesson to you" said Parker putting down his book of Halloween spells!!

I have to thank David Partridge for some of the inspirations behind this story - David says -

David Partridge 
haha, thanks Trev, people who didn't experience the reality would think this pure fantasy!
..................but others know better, whoooooo!

It was also inspired by some of David Partridge's school anecdotes -
"I remember going on a fishing trip with Ian Lewis one night, we were armed with a Javelin, a torch and a tin tray and we made our way to a lake where there was a leaky old rowing boat. I think the lake must be the one on the golf course about due West from the top of the block where the art room was, just to the right of where it says 'Cleobury Mortimer Golf Club'! We didn't catch anything or get caught thankfully!
I can also remember throwing javelins on the sports field in the middle of the night, I think that was with Ian Lewis again. 
The regular midnight trip though was to the staff room to snaffle what ever was left over from the staff supper. If you were particularly lucky there'd be a few fags too. I used mainly to go on my own and never got caught though there were a few near squeaks. Sometime I'd go up to Blount and collect my mate David, Igger, Allen.

Sometimes we used to break into Mr Webb's food store (sorry Rosemary). That was a bit tricky as we had to get through a couple of locked doors. Sadly when we finally got in most of the stuff was in huge tins, (jam and beans) jars or packets, coffee was sometimes in smaller jars though and was always popular.

All in all I was pretty lucky to survive. Some of the best times though were poaching trout in the river below Mawley Hall and cooking them on the bank. There was a ruined mill with a mill pond below that had an endless supply of fish."

Dave Egan we too used to raid the staff rooms, and the fridges and food stores in the bursers office....we pinched a few boxes of choc ice and lollys in the last year of the school, 1980/81..hid them in a cupboard in senior morning we awoke to a pool of multicoloured slosh in the room and got grassed up to fishy plaice....jock gave us 6 of the strap and snow clearing......ouch...but it was funny as hell.

Rosemary Webb Rehill I worked in the school kitchens during my summers off from college. I remember putting out the staff tea and making pyramids with the biscuits. The place always stank of cigarettes. No one ever locked any doors. I think you probably could have climbed in through a window as they were always open too. On one occasion Alan Thorne and dad came up with this elaborate scheme to catch a boy that was taking money. I don't know where it was taken from but together they put blue stuff on the money. The next day everyone had to show their hands. I vividly remember how thrilled they were that they managed to catch the culprit.

Trev Teasdel Caught blue handed! All these anecdotes would make a great series on TV! Somewhat surreal but fun. Beer cans on the pool, poaching midnight fish with a javelin. None of this was in the governor's report!


  1. haha, thanks Trev, people who didn't experience the reality would think this pure fantasy!
    ..................but others know better, whoooooo!

  2. I enjoyed that little story Trev, very funny, when I used to raid the staff room I was usually on my own, sometimes a lad called Lynch used to do it can't remember his first name, if he got any thing he would bring some glasses back so we could drink our contraband in style. By Stephen Donald.